Ghostbuster.

She patted my left shoulder, i wandered why, then my right, followed by both my hips.

Apparently i had ghosts tethered to me, ghosts from the land that i live on. Spirits caught in limbo, well if my major anatomical joints could be conferred such a description. So naturally, she removed them for me, as we continued to dine and be merry. She was a witch doctor of 20 years experience, myself a serendipitous guest unknowingly haunted.

'Three females and two males' she elaborates, 'the female ones have been preventing you from forming meaningful relationships in recent years.'

Why of course! Makes sense now...

The eyes of my translating friend widened in sincere astonishment. 'What?' I ask, 'more than 5?' No. Don't be afraid she reassures me, which curiously had the opposite effect.

'What? Do tell.'

'They are coming. All 468 of them.'

'Eh? Who?'

'Your ancestors, they will soon arrive here and rid you of these ghosts'

'This is a good thing right?'

'Of course'

Home now, feeling lighter. Or is it heavier?